Josh Baker

Sunday, 19 October 2008, 14:26

...

Lilly's only just woke up and she's not talking to me. Well, she said morning, after I said morning, but she just looked really upset and then realised where she was and went to get straight out of bed but I told her there was no hurry. Then she kind of looked at me before pulling the covers shyly over herself and I told her not to worry, I slept on the floor. She looked at me guiltily and I did say it pretty harshly to be honest. I'm just really pissed off about it all.

So then I was just pretending to mess around on the computer just so I didn't have to look at her, cos I knew I would just say something stupid again. She apologised for slapping me and I just shrugged. She asked if I had any clothes she could wear and I got some jeans and a hoodie out of my wardrobe for her. She looked at me when I handed them to her and patted the bed for me to sit down next to her and I hesitated but then sat down. She put her hand on my arm and thanked me for 'everything'. I looked at her and eventually she elaborated and said thanks for dealing with Ollie last night, and thanks for letting her stay. She apologised for making me sleep on the floor, but I told her I slept in the spare room, I just said that to make her feel bad. She actually laughed and I smiled at her, and then realised how close to her I was sitting. She started to talk about what went on between us last night but I just told her not to worry about it, and that I was drunk and she shouldn't take anything I said seriously. She actually looked a little disappointed, and I shouldn't have said it cos it's the furthest away from the truth, but now that she's obviously with Eoghain...

Eventually she left and I don't really know what to do apart from let things calm down and then reassess the whole thing. In the mean time I've got essays to start, ribs to mend, and an old best friend that needs seeing to.